What Do You Do If You Find A Wallet?

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Wallet Well if you’re the punk malcontent who found my wallet yesterday, you go on a shopping spree...at Rite Aid, Vons, and Ralphs (a convenience store and two grocery stores). 

Really, if you’re going to try and spend my hard-earned credit, at least go buy something decent like a stereo system.  There’s a Best Buy just down the street that isn’t much further away than the local Vons.

I mean who spends \$103 at a Rite-Aid?!  Who!?  I really mean it. Who? I’d like to know because I want my wallet back.  And to the store clerks there, doesn’t it even slightly ring the suspicion bell in your head when someone tries to buy \$103 worth of anything at Rite-Aid?  I didn’t even know you could buy that much stuff at a Rite-Aid. I figured buying out everything in the store would lighten your wallet by about \$70, tops.  Maybe he bought the cash register too.

Did you even look at the guy and compare his picture to the Id, my Id, he presented?  There’s not a lot of hapas running around L.A. so I doubt he looked that much like me, assuming it was a "he".

Anyways, yesterday on a short walk, I dropped my wallet.  A really comical mistake like you see in the cartoons. I put my wallet in my side cargo-short pocket, which unbeknownst to me, had a huge gaping hole in it.  I returned back to the area literally 10 to 15 minutes later, and it was gone.  And then the charges started showing up in my account as I frantically called to close my cards.

Anyways, that’s why I rushed out a new release of Subtext last night.  I figure follow something bad with something good.  Oh, and I bought a lottery ticket.  I know, the chances are pretty much nill. But what were the chances I’d put a wallet in a pocket with no bottom?  This is a chance for the world to get back to even terms with me. Wink

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