Fatwa Against Soccer

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It appears that one Islamic extremist has issued a Fatwa against playing soccer by the regular rules. Here are some choice examples.

​4. Do not follow the heretics, the Jews, the Christians and especially evil America regarding the number of players. Do not play with 11 people. Instead, add to this number or decrease it.

​5. Play in your regular clothes or pajamas or something like that, but not colored shorts and numbered T-shirts, because shorts and T-shirts are not Muslim clothing. Rather they are heretical and Western clothing, so beware of imitating their fashion

​8. Do not play in two halves. Rather play in one half or three halves in order to completely differentiate yourselves from the heretics, the polytheists, the corrupted and the disobedient.

Thanks to Walt for sending this to me.

I should note that this is edict was issued by an extremist and is not representative of general Islamic scholarship and thought. I am still waiting for the Christian set of soccer rules. They might look something like...

​1. A woman shall not be allowed to referee as it sayeth in the Bible, 1 Timothy 2:12 “I do not permit a woman to teach or to have authority over a man”. If a woman attempteth to have authority and become a judge, her name and character shall be impugned and criticism by other Christians appeareth in every newspaper.

​2. Whence the ball shall enter the goal, the goal shall be postponed till the scorer recite a verse from memory chosen at random by the referee. Afterwards, to celebrate, the team shall be allowed to pray, but not cheer.

​3. Players shall not lust after scoring a goal for lust is sinful. Only through prayer and should the good lord will it, shall a goal be allowed. One who scores a goal shall not say “I scored a goal” but merely say, “The Lord Jesus Scored a Goal and I was merely his vessel.”

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